Weekly Zephyr #29: Deep Dark

Weekly Zephyr #29: December 14th, 2017

Outi Pieski, Yön Lohduttajat | Consolators of the Night, 2009 I love "consolators"; I love that there are so many of them (possibly heading out for their missions), so grave and luminous and endearing-looking; please send for one if you need one

This week is the big slide to the longest night here in the Northern Hemisphere, so we'll just sit a little in the deepening darkness together this week. We're not going to fight it. We'll float there some, like it's a womb.

 

My uncle Jorma is close to dying of pneumonia in Finland right now. I can't quite feel it yet. Must be waiting until the word comes.

  oh maybe I can  
cropped photo of night lights of Scandinavia I added an extra light in Savonlinna, Finland because it's/he's still there

Benevolent Jorma of the booming voice and nearly no English who sang HEL-lo! and GOOD morning! and GOOD night! and GOOD bye! when he saw you or you were off to bed or you were leaving (and that's all we've ever really said to each other) but it's been plenty, he's come through

all those Bs — there are no Bs in Finnish so he would say penevolent pooming except he wouldn't probably say either thing. no, he'd just be them.

Jorma-Eno who looks like if you took Michael Caine and grabbed his face between your two hands and SCULPTED IT TO LOOK MORE FINNISH, I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW

eno = uncle on your mom's side   

I don't know who or what for you is tenuous or leaving or gone but something (someday, a yesterday, or soon). Some of you reading this have fresh losses/extreme losses rolling in your hearts.

What to say of the darkest darkness.

   

    something is up there*; click it press play and then close your eyes

Lots of people think there's nothing at the heart of everything, that *this* <gestures around to 3D everything> is it, and there's no meaning, and it's chaos. This may be right. I don't know.  Lots of different people—or maybe some of the same people in a different mood—think that there's something more like light at the heart of everything, an infinitely intelligent light, an infinitely loving light. I've always been one of these people, but I wouldn't bet a million billion dollars on it, necessarily.     The idea I like most for tonight (I'm writing this at night) is the one I've heard where instead there's a blackness at the heart of everything, but a living blackness, velvety, that contains the properties of light, somehow. Super most blackest black, empty, nothing there, but somehow also with a luminous thing going on. Not involved in things like intelligence or love, but not NOT involved, exactly.                 I'm not offering this as an idea for something. It's just a thing to be quiet and picture if you want to.  

*that was Sibelius up there that you clicked (or didn't click)
to Jorma-Eno: Näkemiin! Minä rakastan sinua.